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Entry #90

Out Of the Fog Into The Pit

7/21/14 by saltovergray
Updated 7/27/14

So my last post was all "things are going to get better" and that was great and all, but thus far they haven't happened.

In some regards things have gotten worse, and in some they've stayed the same despite my efforts to change them.

I guess that's all there really is.

And to top it all off things are getting even worse but I'm feeling better. Maybe I've finally left this orbit, to discover adventure and friendship elsewhere.


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aListersaListers

5 days ago

My life has actually changed since moving to university. The weirdest thing that happened here is that I actually got a life. It's odd. It's not more enjoyable than having no life (unless you count love which is so far the best feeling I've ever had but I first felt that 2 years ago so it doesn't really count) but it's not any less enjoyable. My life has structure now but that doesn't make me feel different. I needed a fresh start to become normal but I've found a normal life isn't really much more enjoyable - then again I don't drink so maybe it's not quite a normal life I'm living.

I've always found that happiness is just accepting what you have. I don't look to the future as something better - just as something different.


EjitEjit

2 weeks ago

How's it going?


EjitEjit

7/22/14

Hey, now. Cheer up, cherub.

I've been in a similar boat, I think. Recently, or in the past few months, a few things had finally started to move in a positive direction, yet my mood hadn't improved in parallel because I'd been more concerned with other quite superficial failings and regrets. I think it's easy to dedicate yourself to self-loathing and straight up embrace the depression that comes with it, but it's really no good.

Woah man don't lose faith after just a week. And if things do worsen, don't just accept it a la c'est la vie, so it is, que sera sera, ich bin ein Berliner etc. College will be great for you. Apart from anything you drive, and anyone at college that drives is an instant hit.

As ever, a British naturalist put it best:

https://twitter.com/DrLindseyFitz/status/416593082822295552

7/26/14 saltovergray responds:

I appreciate the sentiment.

I'm sure one day I'll look at this whole thing and shake my head or laugh, but as for now it's hard to feel I'll ever do so. You know how it goes, I'm sure.